Dancing with Procrastination

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41 Responses

  1. Sheri says:

    WHO ARE YOU!!!!!??? You just told my story of what my 7th grader and I go through EVERY DAY!  I do not have your sense of humor or your patience.  Wish I did.  She was so motivated for about a week, but now it’s a constant fight and I am so very tired.  She refuses to call her teachers, will not watch live lessons, and every day it seems like guess work, ( not seems like, lets be honest, it IS guess work).  She know how to manipulate me and is too good at it.  I really need some help because I know that I am failing her by giving in and giving up.  I am scared!  Congrats on the essay, and please keep blogging, you are very good at it.

  2. Hang in there!  This may be a cliche, but it really is an encouragement to be consistent in what you are doing and not give up.  It may also help to know that parents in a variety of educational settings all over the world are facing the same struggle you are, it’s another stage of parenting, just like when she learned to walk. Now she is learning to negotiate her way through the learning process and you have to be ready to watch how she’s doing it and guide her through the steps.  For example, if she has spent 10 minutes staring at the book and still has nothing on the paper, don’t be afraid to pick up the phone and call the teacher for her.  Have her call or email the teacher to review questions that she gets wrong, this may motivate her to stop guessing and work harder at getting them right the first time.  It will also let her teacher know where the problem is.  Your teacher is there for you with more ideas on motivation too, so give them a call when needed.   Just think, after you are done with this stage of life, you get to move on to driving! 🙂

  3. Beth says:

    I have the same problem with my son, but his is he doesn’t want to contact the teacher if he is having issues.  I just don’t know how to get him in to the routine of doing this.  So instead of asking for help he guesses or puts his assignment off until it is behind by numerous days.  I am really starting to wonder if my son is cut out for this environment.  I just don ‘t know what to do…  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. 

  4. Celso Cravinhos says:

    Quite informative and objective. I enjoyed reading your comments and suspect that most parents, at one time or another, will have the same experiences. I do think you handled your daughter well, particularly handling the “benign” confrontation in an affectionate way. My son graduated last year and never ever needed nudging or even encouragement to do his studying. He has a busy schedule, for he is a serious tennis player, and has to manage his schedule carefully. I took it for granted and assumed my daughter, now in the 5th grade, will be more of the same. Boy, was it a mistake!!! All the procrastination and excuses in the book, were probably written by her. Obviously people are different and one has to adapt to new circumstances, but frankly I am not sure I was ready for such an abrupt change :). I found that firm affection and show of interest work wonders. I liked the way you addressed the problem and am sure it will help other parents.

  5. Nancy says:

    Ahhhh!  This too could have been written by me regarding my 7th grade son who no doubt by now has memorized all the paint strokes in our ceiling, carpet fiber patterns and wood grain textures in the table.   Certainly he spends more time on their study than on his work at times and I’m ready to tear my hair out.   I think the approaching holidays are making it even harder to concentrate, add a snow day for his B&M attending sister, and I’m ready to throw in the towel!  Thanks for letting us know we are not alone! 

  6. Diahn says:

    I have a fifteen year old who is constantly on ”Youtube” so he never does his schoolwork and to make it worse he’s home schooled so he has access to sites all the time and never understands his work.

  7. Sharon Reed says:

    This is really funny.  I’ll tell you why.  This is EXACTLY what my daughter does “ALL DAY LONG’!  She negotiates,  when there is no basis for negotiation.  It starts in the morning.  I get up,  get the paperwork together that I want/have to help her on.  She starts out by saying,  well, I’m hungry.  You didnt eat this morning?  Well, yes, she says, but I’m hungry again.  ‘Ok, well lets do this math really quick (who am I kidding) and then you can get a bagel.  We do maybe one problem (yeah right, the reality is she sits there huffing and puffing, barely picking up the pencil )  I’m hungry, yes, well lets do two problems.  (more huffing)  I’m like, fine, go eat, she runs off with more energy than she has uptonow shown.  10 minutes later, ok, come do your math (or english or social studies or horrors of horrors SCIENCE!!)  I’m not done with my bagel.  Ok I say,  obtuse till the end,  how much more do you have to eat?  I just started on it.  Just started on it, I say.  You’ve been sitting there for (by now) 15 minutes!  Well,  I still have 1 and a half more to go.

    sighs

    all day long.
    and it never gets better.
    and it never gets easier.
    the only redeeming quality, is that I love having her at home!!

    sharon

  8. Michelle Lindsey says:

    Hi, this is my first time on the blog. Love it! We are not with Connections yet but I can relate to all thats been said. This is our first year to homeschool…6 and 8 graders! Thanks for all the comments!

  9. Karla Adams says:

    I have a Grandson that is in the 8th grade.  This is our second year at Connections Academy.  When he has regular work he does really well, but when he has writing papers or research it’s like pulling teeth to get him to do things.  I think if he knows it is something that has to be drop boxed to the teacher so he purposely avoids it and says he doesn’t understand.  We talk it over and the next day it is the same routine on the same paper.  It does get frustrating for me.  I really haven’t found the best way to handle it yet.  Atleast this year they have it so he can’t move on until he is finished and that is helping some.  I hope to not have an end to our year like last year. With the holidays coming it is getting worse.  I hope I can get a few more big assignments before he completely shuts down.   This is great to have this blog to share ideas and help. Thank you

  10. T. Willis says:

    I may have a suggestion that will help everyone. It is not fool proof, but I have gotten some pretty good results…

    My son is an 8th grader. He has been in homeschool most of his life with a couple of stints in public school (5th and 6th grade). My son hates the public school environment yet did not want to comply with my wishes about his school work. When he was a little kid (in elementary) I used a reward system for all work he completed. This works pretty well even now. My son is very involved in our church youth group and asks me for various things throughout the school year, such as a digital camera and laptop. My suggestion, to him, is that he reward himself with those things by making sure that I get what I want!!! My dreaded school work! LOL. Like I said, it is not fool proof, but I have been able to get most ALL of my school work (done cheerfully) by reminding that he can reward himself with a weekly trip to the local youth group outing and to a new mp3 player or digicam by complying with my wishes. Try it, it may work. Some may argue that these are negotiations, but I have found that he is more motivated and pleased with his accomplishments when he gets a material reward and a good grade for work completed. It works for us!

  11. Tammy Lenze says:

    My son is younger than most of yours (he’s only in the second grade), but I’ll tell you what worked with him. One day, he was being particularly obstinant and didn’t want to do any work. Finally, I said “fine”…you can do it all tomorrow. He thought he won…I gently warned him that meant that he now had to do 2 days of work in 1 day…he said “fine” (believe me, he usually has a lot more to say LOL). I privately sent his teacher an email, letting her know that he wasn’t sick, just stubborn. She knows he is an A student, and told me to check with her tomorrow. In the morning, when my son got online, he saw a letter from his teacher!! He was shocked. She asked him “Sean, are you okay? I noticed you didn’t do any work yesterday. Are you sick? Do you need my help with anything?”. He was SHOCKED…he said that he didn’t know the teacher checked his work every day, just not at the end of the semester. I MADE HIM respond to her email – which he did not want to do 🙂 but he wrote her and admitted he wasn’t sick and he was doing his work today. Ever since this happened, he has been much more cooperative with doing his work (that and the threat of enrolling him in the school down the street, where they sit in a boring classroom for hours and hours!!). Good luck to all of us learning coaches!!!

  12. Yvette Hansen says:

    I have a couple of ADD boys (in other words, easily distracted by almost anything).  We start our day with chores (wakes everybody up and gives me a chance to check schedules for live lessons etc.). 
    Once chores are done and breakfasts eaten, I have had an opportunity to check each students schedule to get an idea of who will need me when (if older child has a livelesson @ 11, that’s when I will help younger child with poetry portfolio that he is struggling with).
    Also, for the procrastinators out there.  I have a “mean” rule at my house.  If you have overdue lessons on Friday night, you have forfeited your weekend.  Saturday and Sunday will be spent “catching up.”  The beauty of this rule, Dad is home on Saturday and Sunday and he gets a chance to be the “coach.”  This system gives me a break from tutoring (coaching), and gives Daddy a chance to see what goes on in my week (and why the laundry pile gets neglected once in awhile).
    I love this system of schooling.  My kids are getting a much better education than they ever were before!

  13. Ginny says:

    WOW, was I shocked when I read all your comments about how to motivate the kids. It described my kids to a perfect T, they love to be home, but dont want to do the work. They always have a billion reasons why and when they are gonna get to their work. They think they are pulling one over on mom, but I’m just too tired to argue or fight anymore. So how do I get motivated again. I know their education is very important, but I’ve lost my drive. I think they finally wore me down. HELP!!!

  14. Susan Colangelo says:

    I have never blogged before . This is great. I also have a 6th grader who uses all of the above excuses. I was so frustrated with my daughter. I thought she had a learning disability. LOL. Keep sending suggestions. They are great.

  15. Laurie says:

    First, I have to respond to the parent who’s 15 yr old is spending time on YouTube when he should be doing his lessons. Educate yourself about the parental control programs available, invest in one and load it on every computer and gadget (ie. I-Touch) that he has access to. Until he can demonstrate the self-discipline needed to know when it’s time to work and time for play you have to get in the driver’s seat and not let him touch the wheel. My 8th grader is much like the students identified in these early blogs and it makes our Learning Coach job hard. I am fortunate to have a home-based business (located in our retrofited barn) where my son has his own office with his school laptop and I’m sure he stays more focused because his environmental distractions are limited. Sharon talked about her daughter and the eating. My son is forever heading back to the house for his next “meal” (thankfully he’s a lean bugger or it could turn into a problem). I have to put the hammer down on that self-distraction often though.
    Regarding rewards, I haven’t had to implement a plan yet. But I can see at this point in the year it may be time. I just received our internet subsidy from the school and may use it in increments as rewards for reaching certain goals (like not getting behind!). I don’t need the money and I’d rather use it to motivate him where he needs it.
    Lastly, he has been struggling with PreAlgebra (embarrassingly mom can’t help) so I hired a local college senior (chem, science, math strengths) to tutor him a few days a week for about $13/hr. She’s happy with the rate, doing a great job and he’s catching up. It’s a subject that he seems to respond better to having a person to sit with him and work through the problems rather than use the CCA tutoring, at least at this point. Hopefully that will change as he grows more independent.
    This blog is great. Can’t wait to see what more coaches have to share.

  16. Beth says:

    Oh my! I loved all of your stories. There are times when I feel alone with the struggles involving my 12 yr old. I am considering switching to Connections Academy to have an external force to help me with motivation, etc. Overall, it looks like a wonderful program. Any comments that any of you have regarding the transition from homeschooling (we actually use a virtual online curriculum) to Connections? I am excited! 🙂

  17. Tracy says:

    Reading all of your comments is like my daily nightmare, my son has a learning disability and since he has turned 13, writing his essays has become such a huge problem.  He is so shy, he will not call his teachers, and when his teachers call, he is so funny all he says is uh-huh. He really does not speak a word,  He won’t admit he has a problem and his assignments are piling up on him .   Mostly because of the essays and labs he has to write.  It takes him forever to put them together, and he gets distracted easily. 
    This is our second year and last year he did so well, I was so sure he would do well this year but now I think he is trying to manipulate every situation. It’s a power struggle all of the sudden and it happened so fast I didn’t catch it at first.  I have been getting radiation treatments for the last year, and finally have been told I am in remission.  Thank God I will be home more now, instead of at the hospital all the time. Now I have a teenager to deal with— It happened so fast…   the attitudes from nowhere  omg—now I am losing my hair from pulling it out with frustration.
    I know that you are right though, patience and making sure you support them totally is so important.   So that is what I have been doing, I keep on gently pushing and I keep on making him work weekends until we catch up.  I have told him there is no such thing as christmas vacation unless we get all of our lessons done.

  18. Sarah says:

    I just found this in my email and am so thankful to read it.  As a mom who works outside the home and this is my 7th grade daughters first year of Connections Academy.  I am so blessed to know that this is a struggle that so many have…youtube, distractions, wanting to do everything but what is assigned.  I sometimes want to just send her back to school but that would be the easy way out.  She does well when she puts the effort into it.  The hardest part is is taking the extra stuff (volleyball, movies, etc) away till all assignments are current.  Thank you to all of you for blogging and Merry Christmas!

  19. A. Robison says:

    My bff just called and told me about your blog.  I really hope you keep blogging.  I have so many questions and your blog is the only one that I’ve found on this subject.  Would you please share more about how you beat the procrastination? 

  20. Åmber says:

    I don’t like math and for me I try to find ways around it!
    Most the time when I stall it is because I don’t get it!
    Don’t do the work for your child either. Help them and show them step by step.
    Even though you ask if they get it they may not!
    Trust me I am a kid and I know what it is like!

  21. Karen Bamford says:

    When I see my older children falling behind, I will run the scheduler again to try to help them out.  I let them know that I will only do this once and next time they just have to catch up on their assignments. 
    If they start  to rebel  or fall behind on  their portfolio’s, I send a private  e -mail to their teacher and have the teacher give them a due date.  They are told no exceptions to this date.  So far this has worked for me and I hope my secret is safe…

  22. kimcunningham says:

    oh I have just read your blogs for the first time..I have a 7th grader that makes homeschooling a night mare..I can get her to the computer but i cant make her learn.mostly my own fault for the consistancy,or lack there of..not real smart on the computer so its really hard for me to help her…just wished i knew how to set up a routine i could stay on daily..looking for some advice thank u

  23. Debra Utpadel says:

    These are all great ideas. I have a 5th grader who does her work ahead of time and without problems. She is usually the one neglected because I have to deal with my two 6th graders who are as defiant as possible. My 6th grade daughter loves to procrastinate and can make anything into a toy or a distraction. She loves pre-algebra and science but flat refuses LA writing assignments. When her 5th grade sister gets involved with brainstorming and proofreading, the work gets done. So I use her to help the other. My 6th grade son, on the other hand, just refuses. He has told me that he wants to fail so that I will put him back in a B&M school. He has tried everything from attempting to cheat (I caught him before he submitted his work), just checking off assignments that did not require an assessment, to check off assignments as being mailed to getting his younger sister to answer the test questions for him. He has gotten angry and thrown his books, ripped his papers and plopped down on the floor and thrown a terrible twos fit refusing his work. I am at my wits end. We cannot do the B&M as we travel a great deal and frankly the schools here are really bad. I need a learning coach’s coach or something. I hate to give up, but this is affecting the other 2 kids. Any suggestions?

  24. Samantha Baker says:

    I know exactly how this feels about the taking so much time thing. And by the time that we are through sometimes I am the one with the headache. I could really use some help with this. So,thank you for this article.

  25. Kim, I have some good news for you.  You don’t have to be a computer expert, to get your kids to enjoy learning.  The trick is helping them to find personal meaning in what they are learning.  Finding personal meaning in learning doesn’t mean that they will enjoy every single lesson, but it will motivate them to keep working at it.  For help in finding ideas to engage your virtual schooler, reach out to your teacher. 

  26. Debra,
    First, let go of the guilt!  You have made the decision that this is the best choice for your family and you don’t need to justify it to your children. Who’s to say they would be behaving any differently if they were attending a brick and mortar school with a couple hours of homework each night? If your 5th grader is doing well, then she definately isn’t being neglected.  Shame on the other two for eating up all your time.  If they weren’t wasting your time, you’d have more energy to go do other things.  I would alot them each an equal amount of your time.  If the older kids decide to waste their time giving you the run around then they won’t get to enjoy doing other things. Find someone to stay with them, and take your 5th grader on an outing.  When the older two can get their school work done, they are welcome to join you.  Remember too, that there are consequences for their bad school behavior. You can’t protect them forever from the consequences of their actions.  These consequences can be delivered by you when you catch them, or they can be delivered by the school.  Set an appointment with your school teacher, counselor or principal, and brainstorm what the next steps should be.  In the meantime, don’t lose focus on the big picture

  27. lori says:

    Wow! So I am not the odd ball after all!! I thought I was the only “coach mom” who had a problem child trying his best to  get out of school work.
    Can you believe  I go to bed at night worried that I’m going to get detention from the teacher for not having my kid do his work on time!
    And how about the excuses??? my kid has a million of them!
    I’m tired- my fingers hurt- my eyes are itchy- I’m hungry- the cat is bothering me- the traffic is too noisy-  The computer screen is extra bright today-  Why can’t I get a snow day off- its snowing isn’t it??  I’m so tired! why can’t I just do work in my room and watch tv while I do my math problems?? I just saw on the news Mom- computers blow up if turned on too much- maybe we should shut down for awhile.
    My Favorites– “Geez Mom.. why do you have to yell so much!!  Its child abuse you know- yellin at your kids when they are sad!! “I am..but first I need a snack!- I need to pee- I need a drink!!- I need to sharpen my pencil- I need to find and eraser -I bit this one off- I need a break!!  When is lunch! Lunch made me sick- lunch made me tired can I take a break??  I need to get a pillow to sit on- How can it be just 20 minutes when I have been down here workin for 10 hours this morning!!
    Old but Good-  “Mom.. this is so stupid!!  No one else does this stuff!  I already did this one- you must have brain damage Mom.. or amnesia!! My friends don’t do this weird stuff- why should I?? Not fair- not fair- not fair- I hate school!! Why do I need to know this!! I’m never making my kids do school work– NEVER!

  28. Judy says:

    OMG I am rolling out of my chair laughing with relief. I thought my 16 yr old (who is in FL Virtual School) was a nightmare. She has every excuse for not getting her school work done. I am so glad that I am not as she says – crazy, mean and totally insane. I have tried so many rewards to get her to do her work. She is convienced that she will never need or use all this stuff she is required to learn. Of course I remember thinking in school there was no reason that I had to learn history. And now I am ghost writing memoirs of military personel and historical novels. LOL If we could only see our future when we are young. I now have her 10 yr old brother starting Connections Academy after reading some of these remarks I am not so convienced I am uncapable of coaching these two. I got so frustrated this week I called in the big guns – her dad. She adores him. LOL  

  29. Jeni says:

    I’m having trouble with my k-gardner. I know most of his problem is that I work 2 day’s a week and can’t have a rutine I really think that would help. I recieved a book from a friend about teaching your child to read in 100 easy lessons, so I am trying it with my 5 yr old who has not started school yeat. She did her lesson that only took 15 min and then she asked what was next. Do you think she will be so willing next year when she has to do it? I love OCA even though it is hard  I also get to see all the light bulbs that go off when he truly get’s it. I also love all the humor in the bloging it really helps to get to laugh with other family’s sharing the same type of problems.

  30. Lisa Cruz says:

    I’m glad I happened took the time to check out this blog.  I have a 6 year old son on a second grade level.  He’s a good student, but I find myself constantly finding new ways to motivate him.  The thing with kids is they get “bored” too easily.  I am including a few of the ways I keep it fun in our house. I hope it helps someone. 
    1. Have them complete their most hated subject first, while they are fresh, then the rest of the day will be easier.
    2. On “stubborn” days convert classes to educational games instead of the usual routine. 
    3. Reward doing a good job only on things he has the most trouble doing.
    4. If my son asks a question about something in school, I not only answer his question but take him on a youtube.com field trip. (example:  he asked about how a battery worked when there was a science electricity lesson.  I went to youtube and found him all kinds of videos on how a battery worked and even how to make one.  Youtube doesn’t have to be the enemy it can be a great teaching tool.  He also learned how to make a circuit and now he asks questions all the time. They have experiments and subject matter for all grade levels.)
    5.  Sometimes he gets frustrated or burnt out and I tell him “dance break” and we put on his favorite music and dance for about 5 minutes to “shake off the blues” then he’s ready to calm down and focus. 
    6. Find out what they love and use it to teach them.  My son loves music so I’ve created a song for just about everything, from counting skills to his address, and I’ve also employed the “Schoolhouse Rock” videos as a great teaching tool. It works perfectly.
    7.  Don’t be afraid to treat your child like an adult.  I confer with my son and ask him what would make school fun today.  If he suggests an art project or a fun activity, that becomes the reward at the end of the day and the motivating factor for finishing his work faster.  It also becomes my ammo to remind him to keep on schedule.
    The only thing I haven’t mastered as of yet is keeping him from freezing up on his teacher phone calls.  He does a fine job reading out loud at home then when it’s time for him to talk to the teacher it takes him forever and a day to read and he messes up simple words that I know he knows fluently.  Even a reward for a good phone call hasn’t always worked. 

  31. wendy says:

    To all coaches using rewards, asking the child what they would like as a reward is very motivating. For my  15 yr old “A” ( formally “D”) student ,it is sleeping in till noon, unless there is a live lesson first thing in the morning. She does her best work in the late afternoon and at night after dinner. So we work around her schedule. We are all much happier, school used to be like pulling teeth. Being on the “A” honor role was a great motivator as well. She still has that first certificate her homeroom teacher sent to her. Suggest it to your teacher if they do not do this. Once they do it they work hard to stay there. For the excuse kids,she used to be one, I read the instructions and work 1-2 problems with her. Then I let her do some on her own. However I do not leave the room till I know she is so engrossed in her work she won’t notice my slipping out. We also take turns reading out loud so she really feels I am helping her, it gets her to focus longer. I of course pause and ask questions on what I have read to her, to make sure she pays attention.  Since we started these little changes she does most work without my help anymore. She is becoming independent, however it did take a few years for us, so hang in there – the benefits are well worth the initial aggravation. Also let them reap their own fruit, whether it is “A’s” of “F’s” it is their life not ours, putting too much pressure on good grades has back fired in the past. If the teacher calls them to question them on a poorly done assignment they most likely will be mortified and will work a little harder. These are just a few of the things we have done to make CA a better experience. We also know not every kid can do well here, we have a socialite who has to go to a normal school. He would die if he was to stay home with mom all day. So keep on trying we are in this together but take all your kids complaints and bad habits with a grain of salt, don’t let them drive you crazy(they want you to suffer as much as they think they are), things will get better.

  32. Helleca C says:

    WOW!! This is exactly what I do. I am not the only one???   I havwe learned that it won’t get done by putting it off so i just suck it up and get all my work done to get it over with!!!

  33. Monica W. says:

    I am a sixth grader at connections academy. I have the same focusing problem. I try but then it gets boring for sitting there for a while. At a public school you never sat in a seat for more than an hour and a half. I always was tired of sitting staring at a screen so I would always find a way around it. My mom realized I can’t sit down and stare at a screen for so long so she made a routine. Now I go ride my bike, take my dogs on walks. play Wii or a game system every now and then and just get out of the seat. It really helps me and I hope it can help your student too.

  34. Jozette Wilson says:

    Oh how relevant this article has been to my life. This is our first year at Connections Academy, although this is not the first year we have home schooled. I took my son out of public school in the 3rd grade, he is now in the 7th, and we have steadily been in search of some type of school environment that would allow me to KNOW for sure that my son was getting a good education. I think that Connections is the path that will lead us where I want him to go.

    I have the same problems with motivation on his part also. He is shy like a lot of you have stated about your children. He flat refuses to call the teachers. There has been a couple of times that I have persuaded him to call his math teacher, since he started Geometry (I have never understood geometry). Both times that he called he got the answering machine and never left a message.

    But I think that one of the hardest transitions that we have had to make has been the introduction to portfolios. Some of them are completely confusing when it comes to the instructions they have given, and it seems that as soon as he is finished with one there are four waiting on him to complete. He gets bogged down with them and then starts the procrastination cycle. Oh how taxing the portfolios are when you are staring four or five of them in the face. I have threaten putting him back in public school again just so I can gain some sanity. Yet I know that public school really is not an option. It seems like he gets his weeks worth of assignments done in a matter of a couple of days and then turns around and is facing all of the portfolios. So instead of moving ahead with his assignments he falls behind because of the portfolios. I guess they are necessary in the learning process but I really wish there were fewer portfolio assignments as this would help out greatly toward my son staying caught up with his work. As of today he is 18 assignments behind because of one portfolio. ABSURD!!

  35. Debra Mixon says:

    We have the same problem with portfolios.  I wonder why that is.  Is it just that they are expected to do something completely independantly and it freezes them up?  I can’t figure out why my daughter (16) gets so frustrated by these items.  It seems as though anything outside the parameters of a regular lesson intimidates her and her thoughts about her abilities to complete the item.  She has this with writing papers and labs too.  The good news is, that most times once she sits down with me or her teacher, she usually realizes how hard it is NOT and dives right in and gets it done AND makes a good grade on it.  But we are currently behind as well several lessons (more than 10) because of one portfolio and one research paper.  It is very frustrating at times but I guess we just have to trudge on, move forward and be thankful that we have this as a schooling option.  I am so thankful that SCCA is in existence.  This is only their 2nd year and we have been with them since the beginning with my 16 yr old and started this year (half way through the year) with my 7 yr old.  My son was failing B&M school in reading with a pretty high IQ (112) but excelled in math.  Since we have brought him home, he is able to read at his own pace and is slowly improving.  He may not pass 2nd grade (we may retain him in reading) but he would likely have failed his B&M school anyway.  But at least he has had the chance to learn to read better where with the B&M school I think he would have felt like a failure and keeping him behind a year would have had negative effects on him.  I don’t think he would have had the opportunity at B&M school to get extra help because his test scores showed he didn’t have any learning disabilities, but quite the opposite.  So tell me where the failure was.  In my opinion it was with the system.  Not so much the teachers but partly them too.  I understand they have 25 kids to keep up with and that some just fall behind but that is so contradictory to the slogan our county has “No child left behind”.  That is not what is happening in our B&M schools.  My son was being left behind.  But like I said thank goodness for SCCA.  We are so grateful to have the teachers and staff of CA on our side.
               

  36. Angela says:

    Hello,
    My name is Angela and I am considering pulling my son out of brick and mortar school for next year. He will be in the 7th grade. I did do homeschooling a couple of years ago and had all the issues listed below. We also had the socialization issue. I put him back in school. What I am hoping for is some kids around his age in Boise/Nampa area to maybe work with and take shifts with a parent. I wonder if that might help with the assignments and getting them done. Especially if at least one of the children was engaged. I hear that some are good at particular subjects and not so hot nor interested in others. If we were able to find children  who are good at what our children are not good at maybe that would be a good push to get the child to get work done.
    I will state it is nice to hear I too am not the only one, for when I was doing homeschooling I was told the opposite. “My kids NEVER argue with me, they are saints!” Not only did my son feel alone but so did I for I had no one to relate with on my issues. And when I would express my feelings I was told not to push him and when he is ready to read he will pick up a book himself. I feel if I ran with that theory he would still not have picked up a book!

  37. Angelique Rodrigues says:

    Hi,
    I am Angelique and I’m a student at Kent State University. When I was in elementry school and high school I was distracted all the time when ever i got an essay to type on the computer. My mom would be so angry at me so I just told her, ” mom, let me put it to you this way I’m a teenager, I have a computer and I have technoligy right at my lap. I want you to know I’m deffinetly not going to do any work but play games and go on to Facebook or something.” Boy that did not take her long enough to block everything on the computer. i ended up doing my essay with my mom that weekend. Well there goes my smart mouth. What I’m trying to say is your daughter is not just drawing on her hand shes also playing games and going on facebook. I loved working with my mom because I got alot done. Mayb thats what you need to do Carrie and all moms having trouble with their sons/daughters with doing work. It helped me, now I’m transferring to Stanford.

  38. Lilly says:

    Hi my name is Lilly I’m an 8th grader and i am with TCAH!
    I do Procrastinate A LOT!!!!!!
    Like I’m doing right now I really don’t want to read this BORING STORY (Johnny Tremain) lol 
    But I know I have to so I’ll start reading it!!!

    For all the LC’s out there here are some tips!!!
    1. Ask once in a while if the kid is getting there work done not all the time it feels like ya are nagging…and No one likes nagging!!!! (Plus if we aren’t doing our work it’ll backfire on us and we get a bad grade, and no one wants that but it’ll teach us a lesson!!!)
    2. When we do something good say some encouraging words!!!
    3. Give us some breaks in the school day.
    4. Have Fun!!!!
    Byeeee~
    Lilly

  39. Karen O says:

    Thank you for this blog! We’re new to ColoCA this year and my 7th grade son is definitely the master at procrastinating! I try not to bug him but it’s difficult when he falls behind on his math lessons – he’s good at math but he has to work at it. I don’t think it’s that he doesn’t understand it, he just doesn’t want to do it. Why do it now when you can put it off until tomorrow? Frustrating for this organized learning coach.

  40. Rockwell says:

    Good article. I will be facing many of these issues as well.

  41. Danielle Rhinelander says:

    Wow!!! I am soooo very grateful to see that I AM not the only Parent/Coach going through this! She was so enthusiastic at first, now I want to cry at times. My husband/her father, owns his own business, so he has long days, so we have became the best of friends. I set her up an awesome cubicle, with computer desk, chalkboard wall, storage, calenders, the works. What I/We found that works, so Jordan doesn’t burn out is splitting the day in half. Half the days work in the morning, and half in the evening. And I’ve tried to incorporate “specials’ ie: library, art, music, etc, as much as possible to feel like public school to her. We go to the local library, art museum, music store, etc: and A LOT are willing to work with us for free because she is a online student. It’s our happy medium.

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